Hospitality and Prayer

Below you'll find a draft of the article I wrote for our upcoming newsletter. Enjoy!

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Each day of work at Samaritan Ministry is a prayer; a prayer that I can put my own life aside and positively affect each individual that enters my office, a prayer that I can handle the unexpected, a prayer that every day is a learning experience. With the help of deeply rooted volunteers and a mission of assisting individuals to build plans for success from their own motivation, Samaritan Ministry has provided an environment that positively supports my prayers.

My home state of Mississippi is fondly nicknamed the Hospitality State. These roots in hospitality got me through my first weeks at Samaritan Ministry when I really did not know what I, a privileged, white, female, college graduate, could offer participants. Ten months later, I still cannot magically dissolve the systematic barriers that the participant in front of me faces. I still do not know more than the individual in front of me about living on the streets or being unemployed for a long period of time. Still, I am called to serve as a companion to individuals facing these (and many other) barriers.

One of my favorite moments as a caseworker is when I realize I have built enough trust with a participant to challenge him or her. Most participants are motivated to accomplish their goals, but we all reach a point where we have to take a leap of faith or make a big change to reach our goals. In Jeremy’s case, he had been planning on getting up to date on his dental hygiene needs for nearly a year before I met him. For many individuals, it is a yearly inconvenience to go to the dentist, but we do it nonetheless. For Jeremy, visiting the dentist brought on a momentous fear of the unknown. He had never had dental work done before and, given his limited English, he had little idea of what he was getting himself into. But as Jeremy and I developed a friendship of accountability, he slowly took ownership of his fear and eventually accomplished his goal. I add it to my list of privileges that I am in a position to listen to participants’ stories and witness their bravery.

Just as Samaritan Ministry has welcomed me as an intern caseworker, I have welcomed guests like Jeremy into the Next Step program. Both Jeremy and I are guests in one another’s life journey as well as in the office I currently use, but the mission of hospitality that Samaritan Ministry shares will continue. I am thankful that my year as a Jesuit Volunteer at Samaritan Ministry has helped me identify my call to accompany others along their life journey. And even when I feel like I know little about how to help another individual, I will remember my lesson in hospitality at Samaritan Ministry. 

The Season of Love

Shortly after Valentine's Day, in honor of the season of love, I created a list of the things I love...and don't love...about DC. At that point when it seems winter is never going to end, one has a love-hate relationship with everything. This list sums up my less-than-deep feelings at the time. I figured it's still worth sharing because honesty along the way is the truest story. After all, this year is about the juxtaposition of the negative and the positive.

Things I love about living in DC:

1. Access to so many cool things (food of all types, music concerts, free museums, lots of other free things, good people watching)
2. Public transportation – I can get places without a car and don’t have to worry about parking, plus, when I’m walking I get exercise
3. Meeting cool people – whether they are stopping through for a convention, or just happen to be living here, I get to meet Davidson alumni and former Jesuit Volunteers; it’s also nice to live in a place where people are more likely to come visit you
4. Every time I’m on my way somewhere and I look up and see a monument I think “holy crap, I live here!” The thought of living in our nation’s capitol never gets old.
5. This truly is the center of the non-profit world. I’ve learned so much about how a non-profit runs.
6. It’s not specific to DC, but it is specific to my experience here: I have awesome roommates! We share with and learn from each other every day.
7. Anonymity is comforting when you trip on the sidewalk and land flat on your face (or have some other similarly embarrassing experience in public).

Things that aren’t as great in DC/that I miss about living in the deep south:

1. First of all, people like to argue that I still live in the South…they just don’t understand
2. Public transportation is expensive and often inconvenient – standing out in the elements waiting for the bus isn’t that fun, and then you climb onto public transportation and have to share tight spaces with way too many people – germs, obscenities…(yes, great people watching, but not always what you want to do on the way to work)
3. I can’t even count how many people I see in a day who don’t acknowledge my existence. I miss being in a place where you know everyone you pass and say, at the very least, “hello, how are you?” Needless to say, I know very little about most of the people I pass on my way to work each morning. And even with the ones that will say hello, it will never move into conversation about family, work or anything. It’s so strange to go to the grocery store and not run into at least one person you know. Sometimes it’s nice to be anonymous, but sometimes it’s just sad.
4. Warm weather! My mom called me the other day, shocked to report the low temperature would be 40 degrees down south. I reminded her that that had been the high in DC for the past two months. I’d rather sweat in the heat than sweat in the winter with 10,000 layers on and cold wind rushing up my coat. People laugh at me every time I wish for the spring and summer to come. They say I’ll regret it when it gets hot and we have no air conditioning. With this I am reminded that in the deep south we have air conditioning everywhere and don’t have to walk around outside in the summer time for long periods of time.      

On the Bus

Let me assure you, my lack of updates is not a lack of substance, but rather a lack of time. However, as my mother always told me, if I really want to do something I will make time for it. So here I sit.

One of the things I've been making time for is yoga. There are so many lovely studios here in the city, and I always feel better afterwards despite the fact that it's a 3 or 4 hour ordeal to get there and back (admittedly, sometimes I miss the luxuries of a car). But more and more I realize the blessing of movement. One of the hardest things I observe around the city on a regular basis is the limitation of individuals with physical disabilities. Whether their ability to walk easily was taken by age or illness, the sight deeply saddens me. Thankfully, bus drivers tend to be patient and kind as men and women tenderly climb and descend the bus steps. But still the thought of elderly Mr. Ingram wobbling into my office on his cane or the young Mr. Gomez shuffling in on his walker and meningitis-crippled legs...I have no words.

Well, I have many stories I could share, but to bring in some happier thoughts to this entry I thought I would share stories from my prime educational scene: the bus. (Don't get me wrong, the bus is not always happier, but i'll just share the positive ones right now.)

Morning ride 1:

This morning on the bus a small African American girl approximately 8 years old sat next to me on her way to school. She was decked out in her backpack covered in hearts and her matching pink coat and hat. She opened up her copy of the Express (the free daily paper with everything from politics to entertainment) to the first page. Not long after I glanced over her shoulder to see who was featured in the entertainment picture did she notice me. To respond to her questioning look at me, I asked her who was in the picture. She wasn't sure, but she folded the paper to the front page and said (read in adorable child voice), "but I'm pretty sure that's Barack Obama."

"You're right! And what does he do?" I asked.

"He's the President of the United States. He's a lot like Martin Luther King. They both take care of the city and get rid of bad laws. Used to, the blacks had to sit in the back of the bus and the whites sat in the front...And Martin Luther King just had a birthday..."

I nodded and affirmed her as she shared what she knew about the two historical figures. Soon she hopped up to exit the bus, and I sat there soaking in the beautiful,uninhibited nature of children. She had no trouble sharing her stories of injustice with me, the privileged white girl sitting next to her. It is in moments like these I feel there is hope for conversation, hope that I can be a part of justice despite my privilege.

Morning ride 2:

On the morning of my birthday (yes, this story is from back in the early winter), I squeezed onto the crowded bus. I wedged into a seat up front. A few stops later an older man climbed on the bus. He did not carry a cane or show other signs to difficulty moving, but as soon as he saw me he asked if he could have my seat. I have no problem giving up my seat, but I did fear he would not be able to fit into the seat where I was only able to sit on the edge for all the people. He thankfully was able to make room for himself as I stood bumping into others.

Slowly the bus began to empty out and I was able to take a seat next to the man. He turned to me and asked "what day is it again?"

I told him the date.

"Sorry, I'm pretty forgetful," he explained.

"Oh, no worries. I wouldn't remember except for it's my birthday." (selfish plug, I know)

"Oh! It's your birthday? Well, I have to give you something!"

"No, no," I insisted.

"No really. Take this dollar," he insisted.

I could tell from his forcefulness that it was best to take the dollar and honor his gift.

"Well, alright. I'll buy something in honor of you."

"No," he said, "in honor of God."

He went on to tell me about how he had a stroke 10 years ago. Soon afterwards his wife took away all his money and his newborn son. He hasn't seen them sense. Now he spends every day searching for a job or visiting his counselor. (Now you know I felt REALLY bad taking his dollar...) It's amazing how people are willing to give out of even their smallest earnings.

***

Pax,

Kelly

Mr. Fredrick

Mr. Fredrick doesn’t want to be one of those homeless men. 

The shelter he stays at (known for being one of the worst in town) brings 3 buses a day into the city. He and the other men are treated like cattle as they stuff in to each bus. Once the bus arrives at the soup kitchen, he stands in line with other people suffering from hunger. Again he feels like one in a line of cattle, weaving back and forth like at Disney World, except the attraction at the front of the line is a simple breakfast, graciously donated and prepared, but nonetheless, not a product of this man’s own hands.

It’s not for lack of trying. He wants desperately to work and show he can contribute to society. It’s more difficult now, since the accident a year ago that damaged his knees and sent glass into his eyes. He barely escaped having to get a glass eye to replace the one that had once served him well in his construction work. He keeps up with his physical therapy sessions despite his difficulty finding money for transportation and the pain it puts him through. 

He’s not the first person to turn to me with a look of deep disappointment and admit he cannot get his granddaughter a birthday gift. He knows she’s expecting something; an 8 year old doesn’t understand or forget just because their grandfather is homeless with no income. “Even something small would be nice,” he says. He says his granddaughter is a sign of hope. He believes she will make more of herself than he did because she's had opportunity and support.

This man, among many others at Samaritan Ministry, shows me that it's not all about your effort in life. Many times it's what we have been privileged to have access to – education, supportive and caring family, positive influences… Yes, determination and dedication matter, but we wouldn't tell a college educated individual who lost a high paying job that it’s his lack of effort that got him into his situation. We would blame it on the bad economy. On the other hand, it's easier to assume an African American male who is homeless is stuck there because he prefers to live as a bum off the Fed’s money and the working man’s taxes.

I see pure exhaustion in this man’s eyes. A night’s sleep in the shelter is never peaceful. Add the worry of finding money for transportation in an attempt to keep looking for jobs. And the never-ending rainstorms that cause the arthritis in his knees to act up.

This man’s been in to my office every day this week. You can't tell me he lacks determination and strength. 

Month 1: The beginning

Hello everyone! I apologize for the delay on posting. Part of my simplicity this year involves not having a computer or internet at home. Now that I’m finally settling into things at work, I’ll be able to update more often during lunch and such. I decided to start by sharing a blog entry I wrote by hand at the end of the first month, around the end of September. As I typed it I was surprised to find how far I’ve come since this point, but I feel the transition period is still worth sharing.

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The first month of a new job and city has been overwhelming. Learning the layout of the city, how to use a bus with confidence, where to buy groceries, responsibilities of my job… the list goes on. Getting on and off the bus at the right location at the right time still makes me nervous sometimes, especially if I’m on a new route. Then again, I look back at myself 5 weeks ago, scared to death of how the bus system works and consider myself experienced.

The bus is one of my biggest learning spaces on any given day. I find myself wondering how my appearance affects how I am perceived by those around me. I make a point of greeting and thanking the bus driver. Most of the time the bus driver is very friendly and wishes me a good day. Sometimes we even carry on a 10 minute conversation about weather, sports and air conditioning.

The overwhelming feelings have not always been tiring and nerve wracking. For example, many times I’ve been struck by the generosity of those in the JVC network. Many FJVs (former Jesuit volunteers) live in the area and play supportive roles in our transition. I can’t imagine moving to a new city and not having this blessing of a community.

            There are also times when I recognize Washington can take on a sense of community. If someone I pass on the sidewalk is willing to offer a hello, it often turns into a short conversation about the day and how we are doing. I particularly recall the other week when 2 days in a row I was reminded that God shines through the people I encounter daily. The first morning on my ½ mile walk to the bus, I passed a man working in the small garden in front of his row house.

“Good morning.” I said.

“Good morning” He replied. “How are you?”

“Good, and you?”

“Blessed.”

            Blessed. I was immediately reminded of a dear friend of the family whom we called Big Mary. Big Mary always answered the “how are you?” question with “blessed,” even as she lay in the hospital with death slowly approaching. I felt God shining through my neighbor, reminding me of Big Mary, reminding me that despite my nerves in the 1^st few weeks and my rush to get to the bus on time, God is good.

            The following day I was again on my journey to the bus stop when I passed a man sweeping the side of the road in front of the local high school. I thought for a moment about how challenging it would be to stay cheerful picking up everyone else’s trash. In that moment I received a cheerful greeting from the man with the broom.

“Good morning!” He cheered with a large smile and a grand gesture as if making the way for a princess to walk down a golden path. With such pride he cleared the way for me to travel down the freshly swept sidewalk. Enough thanks could never be given to those who go about their work pleasantly and positively impact as many people as they encounter every day. God speaks through the kindness of others.

            I have also been welcomed by the Church of the Pilgrims community, a small, socially engaged church associated with the More Light Presbyterians. With warm welcomes and coffee hours every Sunday, it’s a joy to run into the Davidson alumni of all years who attend church there. Plus, I’m able to join the choir every Sunday. I have truly been touched by how welcome I feel in a new place – a home away from home within the first 4 weeks.

            And finally I should mention my work. It’s exactly what I was looking for in this year – time spent directly with those in need, encouraging people and providing the support they need to help themselves. Every day there are new stories to process. I cannot begin to process everything I’m taking in because it contrasts so greatly with my experiences as a college student. I love that I get to learn more about all the amazing resources in DC and how I help someone find a path that works for them. In time, I’ll be able to share more about the lessons I’ve learned, but in the mean time, I’ll say the participants never cease to inspire me.

            More stories to come soon!

Pax,

Kelly

Before the year begins...

A special thanks to those who have contributed to my fundraising and have shared so many kind words of support!

As I walk through Staples and see children shopping for school supplies I come to a realization. I am reminded that, for the first time in my retrievable memory, I have no excuse to buy new pens and notebooks (and if you know how much I love school supplies, you know how much that saddens me). I am doing something totally new: new city, new job, new community. Seeking a moment of comfort in the midst of all this newness, I admittedly bought a package of colored pens on sale despite what I’m now calling “simplicity guilt.” As you may have read in an earlier post, one of the core values of my coming year with JVC is simplicity. I sort of doubt a 12-pack of felt tip pens falls in the realm of simplicity, but I’m giving myself a break because I plan on using them to write letters.

I had such a wonderful time being home for the summer. I found it a refreshing transition stage from college to a new kind of independence. I reconnected with my family, friends, church family, and the community in which I was raised. I reached a feeling of comfort and appreciation for where I come from. As much as I loved reconnecting, it also became clear to me that I need to spend more time learning before I can hopefully some day make a small town like Tupelo home and take a role in making a difference. Thus, a year of JVC begins!

Since I’ll be entering a Jesuit program I thought it worthwhile to spend time this summer learning more about what it means to be Jesuit. James Martin, S.J. makes Jesuit philosophy very accessible in his book The Jesuit Guide to (Almost) Everything. Some fun things I’ve learned/read:

-          St. Ignatius Loyola founded the Society of Jesus (aka the Jesuits) in the 16^th century (p 1)

-          The core essence of Ignatian spirituality is “finding God in all things” (p 5). [Nothing is outside the realm of your spiritual life.]

-          Along the lines of the above - “holiness always make its home in humanity” (p 77).

-          Martin shares a joke that expresses the “contemplative in action” focus of Ignatian spirituality in comparison to other monk orders (p 2):  “Jesuits take their cue from Ignatius in terms of a practical spirituality. One joke has a Franciscan, a Dominican, and a Jesuit celebrating Mass together when the lights suddenly go out in the church. The Franciscan praises the chance to live more simply. The Dominican gives a learned homily on how God brings light to the world. The Jesuit goes to the basement to fix the fuses.”

-          From the Jesuit scientist Guy Consolmagno (followed by Martin’s commentary): “’One obvious way we can let a religion limit our view of the universe is by insisting that its doctrines are a complete and final description of nature and God.’ God is bigger than religion.” (p 137).

-          During prayer one day Martin wondered how Jesus handled the demands on his time. An answer presented itself: “Jesus took things as they came and trusted that God was bringing things before him, rather than trying to plan everything.” (p 154) [Note to self: cultivate spontaneity and don’t be afraid to go with the flow.]

-          A piece of wisdom from the Scottish philosopher John Macmurray that is important for me to remember in a time of fear entering the new: Real religion has a maxim – “Fear not; the things you are afraid of are quite likely to happen to you, but they are nothing to be afraid of.” (p 39).

On that note, I’ll leave you until I’m able to update from my new life in D.C.!

Pax,

Kelly

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Fundraising

      After the whirlwind of college graduation, I find myself recuperating and reconnecting at home in the dear old south. But I can't sit down for long without thinking about all that must be done in preparation for my year as a Jesuit Volunteer: FBI background check, summer reading, packing (how does one pack for a year of simplicity, after all?)... and fundraising.

     Fundraising has always been a sensitive subject for me. In light of recent natural disasters in my area, it's even more difficult for me to ask for charitable donations. I strongly feel it is our duty as community members to be involved in relief efforts for our neighbors. How can I with good conscience ask you to give more when you are already reaching deep in your pockets and hearts to give generously to our hometown neighbors in need?

     On the one hand, I'll admit I'm still struggling with this dilemma.

     But on the other hand, I realize that this duty to serve community is not limited to my hometown. When I relocate, this duty travels with me. In my North Carolina college years, I found my education wasn't complete without time spent at the nearby homeless center. While I am home for the summer I am seeking ways to be involved in tornado and flood relief. (I am thankful to finally be home where I can help rather than stuck taking exams in North Carolina.) When I move to Washington, D.C. in the fall, this same duty will drive my service as a caseworker for Samaritan Ministry of Greater Washington.

     I've been truly inspired by the generous response to the needs of tornado and flood victims. If in the depth of all that giving you can spare another dollar or prayer for my Jesuit Volunteer Corps year, thank you.

     By contributing financially, you enable me to dedicate a year to building constructive relationships with Washington, D.C. neighbors in need. Every dollar given to Jesuit Volunteer Corps is another dollar non-profits like Samaritan Ministry of Greater Washington can spend directly on the people they serve rather than hiring another full-time staff member.

     Through spiritual support, you give me strength to face this challenging commitment. When we pray daily as a community we join forces to serve our neighbors worldwide.

     Through this year (and the glories of free blog services) I hope we can together explore the call to serve our communities.

     Pax, 

     Kelly 

To donate to Kelly's year as a Jesuit Volunteer, please visit http://www.tinyurl.com/kellylencejvc.

UPDATE: A few days after I wrote the first draft of this entry I met with my home pastor. I explained to him the dilemma I have been having with fundraising, especially with asking people to financially support me all the way in D.C. when I felt they should be giving to their own neighbors in need. He responded beautifully: "Kelly, when you were baptized in this Church as a child we made a commitment to support you wherever you go. We are your church family." (At this point in the story my mother cries). So now I go to D.C. with the blessing of my home church - and what a sweet blessing it is.